I’ve actually been thinking about this a lot lately…
To be present in the present is a present.
A gift to my children, my husband, myself, my God. A gift I don’t always remember to give.
Sometimes I’m too caught up in the past. Dwelling on mistakes or wishing for past pleasures. Sometimes I’m too fixed on the future. Waiting for what is to come, either in dread or anxious excitement.
Sometimes I’m even too focused on trying to capture the present moment that I forget to just be present in it. Quick get the camera and document this adorable memory before it’s gone, I think. And while I love photos and videos of my amazing little boy crew…would I remember each gaze, antic, or milestone even better if I just soaked it all in, savored every second as it unfolded before me, around me, within me?
I think of Jude’s laugh. There is nothing like it. Sometimes it rumbles from his little belly. Other times rattles in his throat or snorts out his tiny nose. But every time it’s the sound of joy. Of being fully present, fully engaged in the moment. Whether it’s birthed from my silly game of buzzing bumble bee while changing his diaper, or peek-a-boo behind the door frame at Daddy when I get him after a long afternoon nap. There is nowhere else Jude would rather be in those moments. And try as I may I can never capture the true essence of his gleeful giggle on film.
I just have to be present to enjoy the beautiful present of the present.
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